Day 1

And then there were two.

The TFL gathered in a city for the 25th time to hold their annual player selection draft. Only three owners were able to claim they have attended all 25 conventions, Scott Lacy, Ken Sain and Mike Taylor.

That list is down to two.

Mike Taylor, who had famously claimed to have been to more TFL Conventions than anyone (going to the 2001 New York convention twice), is not in Portland, Maine. For most of Thursday the owners who are here asked, "Where's Mike?"

Mike Woelflein said that he was burning phone lines as late at Wednesday trying to figure out a way to get here. He also reported that there were some work obligations.

Tsk, tsk. Putting work before the TFL, that's something only Wit Tuttell would do.

Only late in the day did word come that Mike Taylor was not in Portland and would not be coming. The news shocked everyone because of all the owners in the TFL who can be counted upon to be there, Taylor was at the top of the list.

But no more.

The 2019 convention in Portland began in two places about the same time. Steve Katz arrived late to Casa Bourque because he missed his original flight while a TSA Agent searched the bags of the dubious Katz, over, and over, quite convinced he was up to no good.

He caught a later flight and arrived in Portland in the early afternoon rather than the late morning as originally planned.

Scott Lacy and Ken Sain were both driving in and stopped in North Andover, Massachusetts for lunch at Fuddruckers. They both gave this Fudds a passing grade, but wondered why was there a soap opera on one of the televisions?

Sain then washed half of Vermont off his rental car (apparently there are no paved roads in Vermont) and Scott sought out a barber in a half-hearted attempt to make himself presentable.

Before long both arrived at Casa Bourque, where the lovely Kendra made them feel welcome. It also wasn't long before Michael Bourque arrived to relieve Kendra of her TFL baby sitting duties.

Casa Bourque is a lovely turn of the century home. It has six bedrooms, three gathering rooms, porches out front and back and one has an outdoor fireplace. Couldn't ask for a better spot to enjoy the convention.

Woelflein was unable to join the crew as his son was participating in an epic soccer match. So the four old friends caught up on news and shared some treats they picked up along the way.

Just before the NFL kicked off its 100th season with a game featuring its two oldest teams, the Bears and Packers, the owners headed out for some great BBQ. Just across the street from the Double-A baseball stadium is Salvage BBQ, the best barbecue in New England. The owners ordered two trays of cows and pigs (brisket and chopped pork), which came with two sides each.

"You know who would love this," Scott Lacy said.

"Wit" the other three replied in unison.

"After his tale of woe of having to work this weekend, and eat that bland English food, and fly in the middle seat, we should share this experience with him to put a smile on his face."

The guys took some photos of the great food, which tasted better than it looked, and it looked great. They then all sent the photos to Wit at the same time.

Tuttell didn't seem to accept the act of kindness in the spirit it was offered.

"Fuck you."

The game wasn't the most exciting, ending with the Packers defeating Chicago 10-3. Still, it was a football game that mattered and the 30th TFL season and 100th NFL season was underway.

The first night was a culinary delight, and the only way it could be made better was if someone came up and asked the boys if they wanted to take some free BBQ home. And that's exactly what happened. The server said they had entire racks of ribs that were just going to get tossed unless someone took them home. Katz jumped out of his chair to say yes. Lacy and Bourque were not far behind him.

Sain, however, declined the offer.

The server handed the three sane men each a box filled with more than a rack of pork ribs to take home. All three and the server looked at Sain and wondered what the hell is wrong with that guy.

Not the first time that's happened in his life.

Because of some exploration of Portland's finest brews, Sain drove back to Casa Bourque where the guys watched the end of the game and continued to get caught up on each others' lives.

Katz and Sain headed off to bed at a decent hour. Bourque lit the fireplace on the back porch and he and Lacy stayed up until early morning catching up on each other's lives.

Day One of the Portland convention was over. There was sadness over Taylor's streak being broken, a fashion disaster when Sain came downstairs in his ASU pajamas, a lot of great conversation, two lovable labs who were excited to have the TFL visit.

But mostly there was great barbecue.

Day 2

Usually there is a clear theme when writing these convention reports that just demands being the lead. They sort of do write themselves.

For Day 2 of the Portland convention, there are two themes that demand attention and the decision on which to lead with is difficult.

Do we go with the owner who promised his participation and then kicked his boys to the curb? Or do we go with the surprise appearance of an owner and the continuation of a streak?

Both are great leads, both deserve to lead, but only one can. (Unless we use a literary device like this one that gets both of them into the lead as a tease of better things to come?)

Let's go with the happy news over the sad.

And we're back to three again.

The Denver Pyles' Mike Taylor is in Portland, Maine and his streak of having been to every TFL Convention continues. Exactly how it happened is up for debate. If you listen to Taylor, the other owners pestered him all night Thursday, begging him to come. The pleas continued for hours, such things as a TFL convention is little more than a gathering without the brilliant mind of the owner from Denver.

If you listen to the other owners, it was a case of the guilts. Yes, they sent Taylor messages, lamenting the end of his streak. And then there was the Day 1 convention report that may have helped get Mike on that plane.

In either case, he used his frequent flyer miles and took the easiest flight of his life to be part of the fun. And he was welcomed by all.

And now for the bad news.

Before finally settling on Portland, Maine as the convention location, the owners asked many times if Mike Woelflein was OK with them coming. "Are you sure we won't get you in trouble with your wife, your kids?" "Do you really want us there, don't worry about our feelings, if it's going to be a problem tell us."

The answer was no problems with the family, come. Now we know the answer was no, come, because I won't be there. The whole reason the TFL came to Maine was so that the defending three-time champ could participate in the convention is his "off-year." (Woelf has a deal with his wife that allows him to attend the convention every other year).

So far, Woelf has been a no show. He missed Thursday's dinner for his son's soccer game. And he skipped Friday's events because he was doing his nails or something.

On to Friday's fun.

Casa Bourque is a great place for the convention. It's large enough that when the boys need some space, they can find some. Gathering around the backyard fireplace has become a favorite way to end the day. Dogs Pipa and Bella are a constant presence and have been fun. And the price is definitely right. Michael Bourque and his girlfriend Kendra have been great hosts.

Breakfast was at Becky's diner on the waterfront. It's a popular spot, so after putting their name on the waiting list the guys took a walk, taking in the sights of downtown Portland. Once they returned, Scott Lacy doubted there would be enough food to feed him. "Two eggs isn't a lot of food."

Famous last words. The waitress brought his two plates, the first filled with blueberry pancakes that covered the entire plate, and the other with eggs, toast, bacon and potatoes.

"Uh, this might be enough," Lacy conceded.

After breakfast, the group drove over to Portland Headlight Park in Cape Elizabeth to walk off their meals, getting up close to an actual working Maine lighthouse. It was a beautiful day and a gorgeous walk.

By the time they returned to Casa Bourque it was about time for Taylor's flight to land. Lacy headed out to greet him at the airport and bring him back. That of course led to more catching up as Taylor described life on his new ranch near Durango.

For dinner the five climbed into Lacy's car and drove to the Highroller Lobster Company. They sent pleas for Woelflein to join them.

Chirp, chirp, chirp.

It was the first experience for most with lobster rolls. Those who ordered them (everyone but Ken Sain, who went with a brisket burger) loved them. After dinner they strolled through the streets of downtown Portland, which are lively. At one point they came across a drum group calling themselves the Zimbabwe Sounds and were entertained with some African beats.

One fun area to visit on a Friday night is Wharf Alley, where there are a number of restaurants and bars on a closed off road with a cobblestone street.

After walking off their dinners they headed over to Bayside Bowl, where they staged the first-ever TFL Bowling Tournament. Steve Katz tossed a spare, a strike, and another strike to start off and cruised to victory. We will not mention the scores of the others because, well, they weren't good, but a few finished in triple digits.

After bowling, they climbed to the top of the rooftop patio, and took in the sights of Portland at night. It's getting chilly so the fireplace there was the perfect spot to relax.

Once they returned to Casa Bourque they retreated again to the outdoor fireplace, where Sain annoyed everyone by watching the Arizona State-Sacramento State football game on his computer, screaming when the Devils disappointed him.

Half of the convention is over and the main person the owners had hoped to see has still not made an appearance. No matter, it's been a great experience so far anyway.

Day 3

What Mike Woelflein has done is truly amazing. Twice before TFL teams have won back-to-back titles, but the Penobscot owner is the only man in history to win the highly-competitive league three straight years.

In doing so he tied Baltimore and Anchorage with the most T. Rexes in league history.

So how does he do it? Woelf rarely divulges any of his secrets but on the third day of the Portland, Maine convention insights were gained.

"JuJu Smith-Schuster," a source very close to Woelf leaked on Saturday. We'll get to him in a minute.

Saturday began with a run to Holy Donuts, a Maine specialty. The owner has come up with a way to make the perfect food even better. He adds mashed potatoes to the batter and boy does it work. The boys at Casa Bourque wolfed them down quickly.

Michael Bourque led Steve Katz, Mike Taylor and Ken Sain on a car tour of Portland, showing all the best locations. It was an overcast day as Dorian finally made its way to Maine. The crew walked around a bit, checked out the sights, then headed to Nosh Kitchen Bar for lunch.

Finally joining them was the defending three-time champ, Woelflein. He also brought along the inside source for all his past success, his 9-year-old son Cale. When the conversation turned to Penobscot winning so much, Cale revealed Smith-Schuster is the secret to Penobscot's success. The Pittsburgh receiver has been on the Wolfpups roster every year of his career.

Once it became clear that the boy was willing to dish, the other owners began peppering the future TFL owner with questions to all the Penobscot secrets. And, boy, was he willing to tell all.

The food was great, some of the best burgers in Portland. But what really got everyone's attention was the bacon-dusted fries.

After lunch the owners began preparing for the draft. Commissioner Scott Lacy ran his tests on the website to make sure everything was up and running, fixing some problems that were detected. He and Sain picked up some snacks to survive 14 grueling rounds of drafting. Mike Taylor headed to a FedEx Office location to print out his cheat sheet (which appears to have been put together in May).

Casa Bourque is a great location for the draft, owners were able to spread out. College football games were on the TV, and everything was working smoothly here. Not the same for owners who stayed home. A couple had some tech issues and there were moments picks were disappearing off the draft board.

Pizza Joint provided the traditional meal with three tasty thin-crust pies. Once again, Michael Bourque continues to show only the best of Portland. Everything has been a huge success.

After the draft there were some conversations about what could be improved. Katz, Woelf, Bourque and Taylor want to reduce the draft to 12 rounds. Funny that, the year that Michael Continelli leaves the league is the year owners begin to rally around an idea he's been pushing for a decade.

They also talked about what they could do about some owners taking between six and 10 minutes to make their pick.

A number of ideas were discussed:

1. Take money from their bank account. Keep a running total of how much overage time they have, take out a similar amount of dollars and add it to the pot.

2. Instead of the stick, try a carrot. Make it a game. Keep a running total of time, and whomever takes the least amount of time to make their picks gets the No. 1 spot on the waiver wire. Whomever takes the most, No. 16.

3. Use an ADP and when the timer hits zero, the owner on the clock will get whatever available player is highest-ranked on the ADP.

4. Set it up so that when the timer hits zero, a dummy player is automatically drafted to hold the spot, then the next team can draft. After they take a player, go back to the first team and if they're ready, they can draft and replace the dummy player. If not, on to the next team.

There were pros and cons with all the ideas. If we go with number two, then an owner who knows he's going get the No. 16 waiver wire pick no matter what is not going to have any incentive to drafting in a hurry. They may take even longer. Number four requires a lot of work keeping track of who is drafting, who needs to be replaced. No one is going to like number one. And using an ADP is going to help owners who haven't prepared by giving them a list of names.

And there are still the tech issues to overcome.

However, owners need to do a better job of keeping up with the draft. When an owner asks in the ninth round why he can't find a player on his draft list who was taken with one of the top ten picks in the first round, that's on them. And there was too much of that happening Saturday. So those tech issues need to be worked out and owners need to do a better job of crossing names off their lists.

The big day of the Portland convention had closed. The 30th TFL season is ready to begin.

Day 4

Bagdad owner Scott Lacy has always steadfastly resisted any effort to bring the TFL Convention to the town that he is living in.

Hosting a convention in your town is a lot of headaches, and not much reward. Your torn between your day-to-day life and doing your best to entertain your TFL friends. There are family and work demands, and then dealing with a difficult personality such as Ken Sain.

Basically, it sucks.

Knowing that, Michael Bourque and Mike Woelflein deserve a ton of credit for somehow pulling it all off for a great convention in Portland, Maine. They were gracious hosts who obviously have a great love for their city and were eager to show it off for their friends.

And those friends might just love Portland as much as they do now.

The final day of the 2019 convention began early, as Woelf had to head home to coach his son's soccer team. It wasn't long before Bourque was up and off for a walk with his girlfriend, Kendra.

Somehow despite being great hosts, they still managed to work in time with their families, usually while the rest of the TFL slept.

Slowly, the TFL owners in attendance woke and got ready and soon were eager for the games to begin and see what kind of teams they had. They headed for Bingas Stadium sports bar. They claimed a corner all to themselves, ordered some great bar food, and were ready for the NFL season to start in earnest.

Steve Katz proved to be the day's big winner, continuing his streak since winning the bowling tournament. After much ridicule for taking Lamar Jackson in the second round, the Baltimore quarterback went out and threw 12 or so touchdowns (we lost count) against the woeful Miami Dolphins.

Before long, Michael Bourque was saying his goodbyes. He had to go back to being a CEO and taking his leadership team out into the wood for a Outward Bound expedition. About the time he left, a tired Woelflein returned from his soccer team's drubbing of their opponents.

He and Taylor then headed back to Woelf Island so Mike could reconnect with his friend's wife and family. More goodbyes, but that is what Sunday and Monday are about.

Katz was next to leave, taking a flight home Sunday night.

Soon it was just Lacy and Sain left. They entertained themselves by heading out for Mexican food, Portland's best (Guerrero Maya). It was actually very good, something you rarely find in Mexican restaurants east of the Mississippi.

Sain and Lacy talked about how Portland was a great convention. It proved that the BnB route can work, we all shared a house without killing each other. It was actually enjoyable. They recognized the sacrifices Bourque and Woelf made in being hosts. They talked about not doing that to any more owners in the future.

And then they talked about the future. Commissioner Lacy wants next year's convention to be special. It will be the 25th anniversary of the TFL convention. He wants a big turnout and a convention filled with fun to mark the occasion.

They talked locations, focusing on Atlanta and Charleston. They hope by putting it in the south, they might be able to entice Paul and Tyler Ramey to come. If Wit keeps his word, and Casey returns, and Dolan honors us ... it could be big.

Atlanta would offer a baseball stadium, which usually helps Wit attend. It's a city that has been talked about before, is a major hub that is easy to fly in and out of, and has plenty to see and do.

The downside will be the heat this time of year.

After dinner Sain and Lacy returned to watch the Sunday night game, which was a dud. And then it was off to bed before their Monday departures.

The 2019 convention is over. It had low expectations going in, because of a number of key owners not being able to attend. Still, it will go down as one of the best because of extraordinary efforts of Michael Bourque in sharing his home, his time and his passion for this Maine city.